You raise me up and break me down and keep talking
like nothing’s happened. You build walls and break silence with a question that
leaves doors open and windowpanes shaken in fear of a storm. You quietly create
a new time frame until all the clocks of my mind break the moment you step into
my space, and smash me like I’d been sent to exile in some place where you,
alone, control my hours. And then I am sent to the frame of “before”; I’m not
sure whether you want me a memory or you want me ‘in’ your memory, although I
can’t but comply to your rules.
You’d think I’m in love but I’m all out of my reign,
so how can I be? Even the words frozen behind my pursed lips never seem to melt
and tell you..I don’t know.
I’ve given up trying to say that I know what to say to
you, because in a time frame like yours, I’m walking backwards to point zero,
I’m breathing your words and what you want me to not say. Your silence isn’t
fit to the space in my soul, it would drown in my own, and in the end I’d speak
my own silence in you.
The cobwebs you carefully design and the chess pieces
moving around me only make me create another reign in your own, until I am your
time frame and you are barely the guard.
Time will make us both gasp for some calmness inside
out. And you’ll quiver with what remains of you to get hold of what will remain
of me. You’ll weaken my heartbeats with your fingertips until I can no longer
save my heart with a borrowed beat. But I’ll kiss the air surrounding you and
let go.
You shouldn’t have raised me up tomorrow.
12/28/2012
7:26 PM.
